Dear friends,
Happy holidays! What a time it is to be writing to you all. I’m only now beginning to figure out where I am lately. For maybe the first time in my life, I need to give the globe a full spin before I land back home, which is an equally frightening and exhilarating thought. I’ve spent the last two weeks remembering what it is simply to say “Merry Christmas” to people. Twenty-three suddenly feels shockingly young to me, but I think if I speak really loud and stretch the line at the end of my paper cup a bit maybe I won’t feel so far away.
How was your 2007? My life has more blurry edges than it has in recent memory, which makes the coming year all the more vital. There’s so much I still need and want to figure out. My five-year high school reunion is next week and all of a sudden five years seems like a remotely long period of time. Where will I be in another five? I visited an orphanage yesterday and it took me five minutes to remember what was important and another ten to realize that I don’t want kids of my own anytime soon. The rest is still cloudy, but I’m grateful to at least have a start.
I want to spend a little more time working on me this next year. I’ve developed a small gut and I discovered just last week that I make a pretty good pasta sauce, which was exciting for me. I’d like to see more live music. I want to go snowboarding and maybe pick up a few small injuries, just to give myself a scare. I want to kiss more people in 2008. I’d like to write more – as in actually write on a piece of paper – and I want my writing to be a little less clever and my speech to be a little more sincere. When I was eighteen I spent half a summer writing a screenplay that got shoved in my desk drawer. Here’s an honest-to-God excerpt:
Wil: (laughs) Never mind him…Here, try this. (Wil picks up a movie off the shelf and hands it to the girl) When in doubt, go with Cusack.
Girl: Hmm, Say Anything. The incompatible and overmatched bottom-dwelling nice guy who pursues the beautiful valedictorian, no?
Wil: Well, I prefer to think of Lloyd Dobler as a hero for the misunderstood, but sure, that’s one way to put it.
Girl: No offense, but don’t you think it’s kinda stupid? I mean, he goes against all of his nay-saying friends and family just for the sake of a girl he doesn’t actually know.
Wil: Well, it takes a man to suffer ignorance and smile.
Girl: Hmm, profound.
Classically bad, isn’t it? It’s awful, but the point is - I wrote it! I actually cared little enough to try and do something potentially embarrassing and grossly beyond my reach. I’d like to get back to that.
What else? For all my whingeing and self-reverence, it’s been a special year. When the paint dries and the ball drops, I can’t imagine having had a better 2007. I am incredibly humbled by the opportunities I’ve had, but more importantly I’m just so thankful for those people, new and old, that I can call friends and family. I may not be able to give much in return, but I can at least offer to all of you this Christmas those things that I
have been able to figure out. So here it is: Travel frequently. Stay close to the ocean. Say what you need to say, and say it loudly. Always choose to exercise before you turn down good food. Cheer for the Packers. Tell those you love that you love them in the moments that you love them the most.
Feel and live. As for the rest, I haven’t a clue.
Happy holidays, and thanks for changing my life. See you next year.
Love,
Jeff
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